The Silver Lining: We Won’t Get Fooled Again?
Tiger Woods? All he did was treat his wife like Tony Soprano treated Carmela. And that show lasted eight years! People loved it. So why has it only taken three weeks for Woods to go from pillar to pariah?
Week Sauce: Where These Robots Are Still Working On Their Crab Dribble
Here’s a recap of the weirdest or most overlooked sports stories on the Interweb this week. Plus, as you’ve come to expect, step 1 in removing the pesky human aspect from all sports.
Stockholm Syndrome Case Studies: Jose Canseco
Remember when Patty Hearst was kidnapped by the Symbionese Liberation Army in January 1974 and eventually helped the terrorist organization rob the Hibernia Bank several months later? Or when Sal “Big Pussy” Bonpensiero avoided doing jail time by aggressively and enthusiastically informing the FBI of the activities of the Soprano organization? Clinton pardoned one and Paulie Walnuts helped whack the other.
Jose Canseco falls somewhere in the middle.
President Obama Doesn’t Care About Athletic People
Have you ever been asleep, only to be subconsciously jarred awake by a loud noise? Then while you’re lying there, dazed and still half-slumbering, it occurs to you that you may have dreamed the loud noise that supposedly woke you up in the first place?
That weary, displaced emotion is what I’ve been feeling about our president ever since the baseball All-Star Game. Something ain’t quite right. It’s unsettling. And it’s only getting worse.
I’m beginning to think that he isn’t really all that into sports.
Nomar’s Return: Are Sawx Fans Getting Sawft?
Boston baseball fans will tell you they have a sixth sense about their brethren. They’ll tell you they have inside information of their beloved team and the players connected to it that is otherwise unavailable to those foreign to Red Sox Nation. They’ll tell you they patiently waited out David Ortiz’s horrific spring slump without boos or jeers because they knew – they just knew – Papi would turn it around. Without telling you that they know more than you, Sawx fans will tell you they know more than you.
