Pun Alert: Puttin’ Some English On The College Lifestyle
There’s a cynical view shared about most of today’s college students: impetuous, reckless, irrational, occasionally dispassionate and often short-sided. Which is why, when Mike DeArmond wrote about Missouri guard, Kimmie English on Thursday, the follow-up reaction around the media was surprising.
Long story, short: the likely leading scorer for the Missouri Tigers men’s basketball would not only be a dude named Kimmie, but is preparing for such a role by literally sleeping in the gym to cut down on time he won’t have to practice.
LeGarrette Blount’s Future Is Fuzzy, Ask Again Later
Labor Day seemed as good of a day as any to clean out the Sidelines attic of all the rubbish that no longer had any real use for us in the office, foolishly concluding that our future-gazing crystal ball was one of such items. There are no surprises left in sports, right? Of course Tila Tequila risked getting choked out by a San Diego Charger. Of course Venus Williams was going to get busted out in the third round by a player who’s been breastfeeding for two years. And of course an Oregon Duck was gonna do some punching to start the college football season.
I mean, who couldn’t see those things coming?
In the case of Oregon’s pluckiest Duck, LeGarrette Blount, there are enough unknowns left in that kid’s future to make keeping the ol’ crystal ball around a while longer seem like a decent idea.
We Have Seen The Future, And It Is Bleak If The Great One Falls
It’s become clear that if Tim Tebow misses time this season to injury, then everything you think you know about the 2009 college football season will change.
Spirited Away: UConn Cheerleaders Demoted To UConn Fans
When you filter a cheerleader down to its most basic types, you get:
1) The toothy, go-getter with school-spirit buttons she genuinely hopes you keep pinned to your backpack until you graduate.
2) The attention-starved gymnast.
Earlier this week, the University of Connecticut announced they’re doing away with the latter to make room for the former. UConn is scaling back cheerleading in favor of “spirit squads” and I know what you’re thinking: “What’s a ‘spirit squad’ and how will it affect my oogling of 20-year-olds right before commercial breaks?”
Act Now, Before The SEC Smashes Your Computer
Now that the Southeastern Conference has established its dominance over the rest of college football, it’s now turning its attention toward smothering the internet with a pillow.
The SEC’s television deal with ESPN made national headlines a year ago. But as the SEC on ESPN debuts this fall, the conference’s policies on new media are starting a brush fire across the Internet.
