Prince Fielder’s Thinkin’ Machine Is A Little Slow
Photo courtesy of Yahoo! Sports via AP
L.A.’s Guillermo Mota tenderized the thick leg of Milwaukee’s Prince Fielder Tuesday night. It was retaliation from two innings before when Chris Smith did the same to L.A.’s Manny Ramirez. This is the job, it’s all part of baseball. Especially for Mota, who’s plunked former Met Mike Piazza enough times to write a dissertation on the different sounds the ball makes when it hits different parts of his body.
Mota was tossed on Tuesday for his retaliation, of course. But after helplessly getting choked by Piazza while holding a pair of cleats (?!) in 2002 and then, a year later, impotently throwing a glove at Piazza before backpedalling right out of the stadium, we should hand it to Mota for getting tossed from Tuesday’s game with virtually no loss of dignity.
There’s not much to add about Mota. Fielder, on the other hand … well, there’s quite a discovery to be made from his actions on Tuesday. With the Dodgers handily winning 17-4 with two outs in the bottom of the ninth, Mota threw a 4-seam fastball into Fielder’s meaty hamhock. Fielder laughed, jiggling like a bowl full of jelly, Mota hit the showers and Ramon Troncoso came in to pitch the remainder of the game.
Troncoso warmed up for five minutes, then threw 90 seconds worth of pitches (3) and the game was over. Sprinkle in another five minutes of post-game interviews, last-minute hoarding of Dubble-Bubble and Fielder’s mad dash into the Dodger’s clubhouse in hopes of a face-to-face with Mota and we’re talking a total 12 minutes having passed between events. Twelve minutes in between Fielder getting hit and Fielder trying to choke Mota before he could find a glove to throw defensively in Prince’s direction.
Twelve minutes.
Fielder looked confused (bemused maybe?) right after getting plunked. His demeanor didn’t change much once he headed down to first base, by which time Mota was gone. What happened?
It took Fielder’s brain a dozen minutes to recall (probably) the Piazza debacles from six and seven years ago. How can a man who recalls the past so slowly hit a fastball with such ease? Geez Louise, man. Six years in 12 minutes; that’s two minutes for every year of recollection. He’s got an Apple IIe making all his decisions for him.
Quick! Think about your favorite high school memory … … … You’ve thought of something, haven’t you? See? That took, like, three seconds, tops.
L.A.’s Guillermo Mota tenderized the thick leg of Milwaukee’s Prince Fielder Tuesday night. It was retaliation from two innings before when Chris Smith did the same to L.A.’s Manny Ramirez. This is the job, it’s all part of baseball. Especially for Mota, who’s plunked former Met Mike Piazza enough times to write a dissertation on the different sounds the ball makes when it hits different parts of his body.
It’s not going to hit him until tomorrow how ridiculous he looked getting halted at the Dodger’s clubhouse door by an overweight man with a nametag. He’s gonna be so embarrassed tomorrow when his brain processes that.
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