This Is Why We Don’t Wager With Murderers
Former New Jersey forward Jayson Williams and his sordid and ultra-violent past are old news. But every once in a while a story reveals itself to be too surreal not to share. “The Jayson Williams Dog Story” is an example of such a revelation. The story itself isn’t new, it happened in 2001 and was submitted as evidence in Williams’ 2004 trial. Unfortunately, the submission was denied because the statute of limitations on criminal charges has expired on that incident. So the details of “The Jayson Williams Dog Story” were left unknown.
Until now.
So what am I talking about? Come follow me as I provide running commentary through former NBA center Dwayne Schintzius‘ retelling of the incident. For those that aren’t familiar, Dwayne “The Lobster” Schintzius played with Williams and also testified in his trial that he witnessed “The Jayson Williams Dog Story.” He also has that mullet, which deserves a blog post of its own.
This is an approximate transcription of the story he told Rock Riley of WDAE 620 radio in Tampa on Thursday.
I was spending the weekend with Jayson. He had recently suffered a career ending injury and cashed in his $87 million insurance policy from Lloyds of London. Holy Hell! Who is this Lloyd and why did he give someone like Jayson Williams an $87 million insurance policy? He lived in a 31,000 square foot mansion on 300 acres. It’s always weird to me when someone knows so much information about someone else’s stuff. I’m not even sure how many square feet my apartment is, much less the acreage of my friends’ house. It was like a compound. Anyway, one night we are hanging out, and he had this 150 pound rottweiler named Duke. Of course he was named Duke. Anyway, Jayson was talking about how tough Duke was, and I bet him $100 that I could drag Duke out the front door by his back legs. That’s a weird bet, right? Only a man with a three-foot mullet would think to make a bet like that. The front door was about 15-20 feet away. Oh, so that’s a little less weird then. If only Michael Vick’s dog pens were 15-20 inches shallower, people wouldn’t have been so down on the guy.
Anyway, so he agreed to the bet, and the game was on. Suddenly, Jayson started shouting attack commands to Duke, trying to get him to maul me. If that’s not a bet forfeiture, I don’t know what is. I started baby talking Duke, ‘Come on big fella, how are you Duke?’, etc. Rottweilers love baby talk. So do grizzly bears and barracudas. So Duke lays down on his side for me to scratch his belly, Whaaa?! and so I scratch his belly and drag him out the door. I said to Jayson ‘OK now pay up’. Jayson says ‘OK I’ll be right back’ and goes back inside the house and upstairs. Uh-oh.
After a minute or two, Jayson comes back down with a double barrel shotgun. Without a word, he pumps a round into Duke’s side … at which point Schintzius calmly finished his Labatt’s and then blows his head off with the next shot. … at which point Schintzius is thinking that Williams’ $100 will not be forthcoming. He then reloads, points the shotgun at my head from a foot away and says ‘Schintz, get this ******* dog cleaned up and out of here, or you’re next.’ If I ever have a gun pointed to my head, I hope no one calls me by my nickname while they threaten me. I said ‘Please Jayson, just don’t kill me.’
His brother … who was in the den playing Playstation? and I ended up picking up Duke and taking him to a spot on the property and burying him. Out of spite, I hope they only dug a 4 1/2-foot hole. That’ll teach him! Jayson had gone to bed by the time we got back to the house. The next morning I woke up, He STILL slept there?! walked into the kitchen, and there was Jayson wearing a ‘Kiss the Cook’ apron, making pancakes with … don’t say dog bits, don’t say dog bits … a big smile on his face (whew), acting like nothing had happened … just like my girlfriend the nights after she gets drunk and makes fun of me in front of all my friends.
Apparently Schintzius and Williams were friends in 2001, but by 2004 Dwayne was testifying at his murder trial. It’s got to be because Williams made him bury bits of Williams’ dog and didn’t own up to the bet, right? See? Eight years after it happened, five years after it was mentioned publicly and 30 years before Schintzius cuts that mullet, we have the craziness of “The Jayson Williams Dog Story.” Tell me your week isn’t made. No? Well how ’bout one more Lobster picture before you go. Y’know … to end on a high note.
There. Don’t say I never did nothin’ for you.
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Photos courtesy of Flickr
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