Show of Hands: Who Still Thinks Monkey King Is Undeserving
At the beginning of the season, there was little buzz about Sun Yue, the new Laker guard known as the “Chinese Magic Johnson.” By the All-Star break, Sun fell to fourth on L.A.’s point guard depth chart behind Derek Fisher, Jordan Farmar and first-year Laker Girl Jessica. Indeed, he’s become a forgotten man on an NBA Champion squad full of superstars and top-shelf role players. Or so most fans think. Sidelines sat down with the Monkey King himself (and M.K.’s translator), amidst all the hubbub of being an NBA champion, for a telling interview in which he discusses Matchbox 20, championship prep and why he’s clearly as deserving of a ring as anyone else.
Sun forcing an excited Trevor Ariza to back off during Kobe's 'me time.'
SIDELINES: Monkey King – I hope you don’t mind if I call you Monkey King – what was the first thing you did when you got back to the locker room after Game 5 in Orlando?
MONKEY KING: I helped some of the traveling assistants prepare all the champagne bottles and made sure the tarps were secured around the players’ stuff.
S: Really? You weren’t on the court giving interviews to the Chinese media or anything?
MK: (Laughs) Oh, no. Heavens, no. No one over there remembers I’m on this team. They patiently waited for a chance to talk to Mr. Bryant.
S: Kobe?
MK: I call him Mr. Bryant. He asks that I call him that.
S: Why?
MK: Anything less would confuse our professional relationship. It’s part of the deal we’ve worked out.
S: What deal?
MK: I sit with him on the team plane and stop other teammates from talking to him when he’s tired or listening to Matchbox 20 and in return he…well, he lets me do that.
S: Kobe Bryant listens to Matchbox 20?
Exhibit A: Kobe Bryant is only happy when Sun makes him Salt 'n' Pepa mixes.
MK: Not just Matchbox 20, but that is his favorite. I burn him mixed cds from all the illegal songs he makes me download. He said he’d download them, but he doesn’t want to risk getting caught. Which makes sense. It’s for the good of our team that he not get caught. I’m happy to risk it. That’s one of the reasons I deserve the ring. We would never win a championship if Mr. Bryant was upset all season, right? My job on this team is to make sure Mr. Bryant and sometimes Lamar are happy.
S: Some would say your job is to learn how to run Phil Jackson’s offense; probably by watching Derek Fisher.
MK: Interesting, but ultimately, false. Also, please don’t tell Mr. Bryant that I ever help Lamar.
S: Do you have any other duties on this team?
MK: Coach Jackson told me to stay out of his way once in December. So I started doing that.
S: You couldn’t totally have avoided him. After all you played 28 minutes spread out over 10 games this season.
MK: Yes, that’s true. But most of the time I just sat next to [D.J.] Mbenga. Coach would point for him to enter the game and I’d get up thinking he was pointing at me. Most of the time Coach Jackson would tell me to sit down. But every so often he’d stop paying attention long enough for me to slip onto the court.
S: To hear you tell it, you played a very limited role on this Laker team. Why do you feel you earned a ring just as much as anyone else?
MK: Everyone has a role on this team. For example, Trevor’s is to be a relentless help defender as well as premiere yo-yo artist. Pau does an excellent impression of James Brown and me? I make Mr. Bryant happy. I rub his feet, pre-sip his Gatorade to make sure it hasn’t been poisoned and I am his alibi when he’s lying to his wife. Can we not all agree that making Mr. Bryant happy is of the utmost importance in winning a championship?
S: If that were true, Monkey King, how did Kobe Bryant manage to win three championships with Shaquille O’Neal?
MK: (Blank stare) This interview is over …
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Photos courtesy of Yahoo! via Getty Images
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